The Boobie Melt Down.....(literally)

OK! so back to round two with this "image"....I decided the "girls" needed some definite boosting...and while 90% of the women I encounter on a daily basis have PERMANENTLY "boosted" theirs I just am not mentally, nor financially ready for the step just yet.

The ever so lovely Victoria Secret was sure to have just what i needed...a lil "umph" and ALOTTA push! The clerk was great and said she had the perfect "wonder bra" for me so off we went...well it was a wonder alright!! That I could see me NECK after the things were shoved, lifted, puffed, and secured right into those bra cups the bulged as if they were muffin tins that had too much cake mix in them. She smiled and said "perfect"! Looks awesome!...as open mouthed I gocked back at my reflection. I thought I looked more like a "stage performer" then a housewife but just then she mouthed the words that sealed the deal....tossing her perfect golden locks over her shoulder she smiled "YA know I love it that even though you're married you still wanta look hot...now that's couture"....ALARM BELLS WENT OFF!!!! "I'll take it!" I proudly strolled myself to the check out, wearing my new weapon of choice and laid the credit card down. I felt like I could take on the world...as if that new "set of twins" was my golden ticket to ...whatever I wanted!

When I arrived home that evening I waited for my husband to arrive just sure he'd be wowed with my latest update! Luckily he's learned that he never is quite sure what he will come home to so something that isn't permanent, didn't ruin any part of the house, and won't cost a fortune to fix...he appreciates!

As he rounded the corner to the kitchen where I was standing over the stove I saw his eyes work their way up to mine.

"What are those?" he pointed to my chest
Ah ha! I knew he'd be impressed...maybe just MAYBE I was gettin' this trophy wife stuff down! As I turned to "shimmy" him a hello! I suddenly felt a gap between my skin and my left breast....simultaneously I heard the spppprrr-clunk into the vegetable soup I was stirring....

NO!!!! I screamed...and began frantically fishing my silicone falsee out of the mess!...as I began to pull it out I noticed half was missing...as I peered into the bottom of the pan I found it ...melted onto the pot like hot wax....and then and there with one breast still at attention the other bubbling on the stove...I had a melt down....

My husband, still in shock from his eventful 10min. home, began to laugh...and as he laughed I cried....I cried until I laughed and as he wiped the gunky mascara from my face he kissed my forehead and simply said "I'll order Chinese"...